Why does my finger hurt?

I slammed it in a car door and now it hurts really REALLY REALLY BAD!!!! I feel like Im about to die or somthing!!!! It keeps on making noises.... like "bud ump bud ump bud ump" and so I sucked on it, but then it sounded like I was burping. My friend said that Im nasty because my burps stink. Why do they stink? I think there are alot of things wrong with me... like why am I rambeling on about stuff that has nothing to do with my question??